Is there anyone out there who doesn't like Doctor Who? How about The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy?  Anyone out there who thinks combining the two would be most righteous?  Actually there is, and his name is Andrew Orton, and he's done a pretty amazing job.  Here's the video, which is via Cory Doctorow and Boing Boing.

Campaign to De-humanize Doctor Who

Is it just me, or is the Time Lord becoming way too human? What's the point of having more than one heart if you're just going to act like you only have one heart?

I just don't think the writers are seeing things from a superior being's point of view. See, a Time Lord would see us humans the same way we see hamsters. We're cute and fun and entertaining to have around. And if you lose one, you get another. You don't pine season after season over the cute little hamster that you lost somewhere. Why would you? You've got other cute little hamsters. To think we humans make that much of a lasting impression on the universe is total megalomania. Ego check: we're hamsters, not heroes.

Doctor Who Regeneration

Just watched the season finale. I found it entertaining, fun, and ... unsatisfying. I loved seeing the old Captain Harkness back. At the thought of three versions of the Doctor running around, he blurts out, "I can't tell you what I'm thinking about!" Exterminated by the Daleks and he still can't help thinking ...

I also loved Doctor/Donna. I didn't like the way they got rid of her, though. Too cruel. Too easy.

And giving Rose her very own "Grows Old Like A Human!" Doctor to play doctor with? I'm thinking ... yuk.

And it was sad seeing Harriet go.

And what's with all that loud, OTT dramatic, sentimental music?

And why did the end have to be so depressing?

I guess that's the crux of my dissatisfaction. I'm just not liking Russell T. Davies's universe. This whole thing about the Doctor being lonely. Oh, so lonely. This whole thing about the Doctor being the only Time Lord (well, there is the psycho Time Lord running around). Davies has turned Doctor Who into The Wanderer. Someone/something EPIC. The lone cowboy/samurai, the only law left in the wilderness. I liked him as an eccentric. Epic is boring. Epic is narrow. Epic is a male invention. Glorifying maleness. BTW, I'm really getting tired of women drooling over the Doctor. It just turns Doctor Who into a geek fantasy. He's not all that. Wouldn't it be great if it turns out the Doctor is suffering from an ego-maniacal condition and that when he snaps out of it, he'll realize the universe is full of nice Time Lords who are more than willing to be friends with him?

Doctor Who

Wasn't Alex Kingston wonderful in "Silence in the Library"! And I love her name: Dr. River Song. It's great to see her having fun after all those years of grumpiness in ER.
I have to say that the last few Dr. Whos have been so much fun. And with actual tension and surprise. Part of the fun is the sparkle the girls have added. Like Georgia Moffett as the Doctor's daughter Jenny (episode "The Doctor's Daughter"). How much you want to bet she's another spin off? Initially, I was a little disappointed to find out Jenny was a genetic clone thing -- I was hoping some of the Doctor's relatives were finally going to start appearing. After all, the original Dr. Who had his granddaughter. That means he also had at least one daughter or son. And maybe a wife? And parents?

"Silence in the Library" had several enjoyable elements, like the way the brain waves remain for a short while in the transmitters. The little girl who turns out to be the security system for the library. The Doctor being so clueless to who River is and being so upset about it. For the first time in a long time, I actually wanted to know what was going to happen next. It certainly hit all my buttons. I hope the writer of the episode, Steven Moffat, writes a lot more! Great use of technology exploration -- true sci fi, if you know what I mean. Just one thing -- enough with the corporate villains!

I've also been impressed by the roster of stars that have been appearing this season. Not just Alex Kingston, but Felicity Kendal and Fenella Woolgar. Someone really appreciates girl power. Is Dr. Who becoming the next Midsomer Murders?

I hate to spread rumors, but I can't help myself. Seems David Tennant romances a lot of the women who appear in Dr. Who, including Georgia Moffett. Who would have thought he was such a real-life Casanova (of course he played Casanova in a pretty bad movie version -- I'm so tempted to write my own version because they've all stunk to high hell)! He does have a great sparkle in his eyes. I've been a fan since seeing him in He Knew He Was Right (he was superb in The Chatterley Affair). In fact, when I heard Christopher Eccleston was the new Doctor, I screamed, "You've got to be kidding! They should get David Tennant!" Well, strangely, I ended up liking Eccleston as the Doctor and not really enjoying Tennant because with Rose, the Doctor was just a giggling juvenile fool. I mean, if I'd been Queen Victoria, I'd have established an agency to eradicate David Tennant too. But without Rose, and with Donna, Tennant is much more watchable. Of course, he's leaving ...

I just hope Alex Kingston comes back again and again. Too bad Time Lords don't change gender. She'd be a fantastic Doctor.

Doctor Who and the Spin-offs

So why do I like The Sarah Jane Adventures but loathe Torchwood? And I was really excited about Torchwood when I first heard about it. Captain Jack Harkness in his own show? Bring it on! I loved the fun, naughty, sexually omnivorious alien. When Captain Jack finds out his naked body is going on air to zillions of viewers, what does he say? "Ladies, your ratings just went up." I loved it.

So what happened to Captain Jack? Torchwood happened. Ugly, human-hating Torchwood. That incessant, constant, nauseating drumbeat of "It's us! We humans are our worst enemy!" The aliens aren't even any fun. Torchwood was supposed to be grown-up Dr. Who. Who wants a grown-up Dr. Who? Look, if you want to go the way of Buffy, Farscape, Firefly, you're going to have to up the ante -- like get some imagination. And throwing in sex scenes isn't grown-up. And, listen, outside of Captain Jack, I really don't want to see the cast having sex.

Now what I like about Sarah Jane is that since it's aimed at kiddies, they haven't tried too hard. You don't see the writers angsting and thinking above themselves. Instead, it's a show the gods of Light Entertainment would approve of. And, of course, you have Elizabeth Sladen. And the writers have let Elizabeth Sladen do her Sarah Jane thing. They haven't tried to transform her into some modern Freudian creature of the dark like they did to Captain Jack. They just let her be what she's supposed to be, the hero. It was nice that they let her be so clueless to human relationships that when her adopted alien son rants about how out of place he feels at school, she does an "Oh, well, better luck next time" instead of explaining that feeling alien and out of place is a teenage rite. And she's right, aliens are much more interesting so forget human psychology. In many ways, Sarah Jane is now more the Doctor than the Doctor. They've inadvertently put his real soul into Sarah Jane -- god only knows what's in the current Doctor. After all, the Doctor was originally an alien who liked being around humans. Not a human who thinks he's an alien.

It's amazing what a good cast does for a show. The cast is good in Sarah Jane. Not really good at all on Torchwood. By that I mean there isn't any charisma, any spark of life. Partly, that's the writing, but partly, that's just miscasting. Like if they were going to change Captain Jack that much, they might as well have cast a completely different actor. It's just not John Barrowman anymore.

As for the core, Dr. Who, I basically like it. But here's where I think Russell T. Davis goes wrong: in the human relationship department. I know he's trying to get to the heart and soul of the Doctor, how his vagabond life affects the humans and aliens around him. But it's just too persistent and heavy handed. Like every show. Over and over again. And not Mike Leigh subtle but Steven Spielberg orchestra pouncing spectacle.

And why are they always in England? On or above the earth? I get it that the Doctor is a terraophile but come on! Let's use the tardis for a little bit more fun than lame time travel around the earth. Well, they did do a dimensional thing but it was STILL on the earth.

And if they're sooooo keen on doing a romance on the Doctor, BRING BACK ROMANA. (I adored Lalla Ward's Romana.) A nice, feisty, acid-tongued Romana. (I'm sick of the goofy, cutesy girl companions of late.) I'd love to hear how she's been getting along since going off into the other universe.